{"id":52748,"date":"2017-09-01T08:03:52","date_gmt":"2017-09-01T06:03:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.times.mw\/?p=52748"},"modified":"2017-09-01T08:03:53","modified_gmt":"2017-09-01T06:03:53","slug":"cut-the-head-get-rid-of-the-body-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/archive.times.mw\/index.php\/2017\/09\/01\/cut-the-head-get-rid-of-the-body-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Cut the head, get rid of the body"},"content":{"rendered":"

T<\/strong>here is some place in Blantyre, where pub talk is usually diverse. Within the complex, there are three bars: one for those who like loud music and the other two for gurus who like sipping their \u2018stuff\u2019 as they tackle all sorts of issues.<\/p>\n

It is in one of the latter where we are. We started with the more popular common bar before one of us suggested that the subject our talk centred on deserved a more \u2018private\u2019 place.<\/p>\n

And this subject has come in a very funny way but has graduated into a serious debate.<\/p>\n

The talk ignites after one of the young men in our company talks of how his neighbour beat up his wife and ended up becoming a subject of ridicule in the community.<\/p>\n

\u201cEti zoona kumenya mkazi n\u2019kumuotchera zovala zonse <\/em>(just imagine beating one\u2019s wife and then setting all her clothes on fire)? The things some men do leave me disappointed because I was born a man,\u201d he says.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat did the wife do to deserve that barbaric treatment?\u201d I ask.<\/p>\n

The young man tells us that the man had discovered the wife was cheating on him and rumour had it that he found the lover \u2018in action\u2019 with his wife.<\/p>\n

\u201cNanga osangomusiya mkaziyo <\/em>(why not just divorce the woman)? Really, why would a husband set a wife\u2019s clothes on fire? He will just spend more money to replace the clothes,\u201d says my friend Grawel.<\/p>\n

But some young man with grey hair for a moustache says we are wrong in demonising the husband.<\/p>\n

He says there is nothing as devastating as finding out you are sharing a woman with another man \u2013 be it a wife or girlfriend.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe husband was even right to set ablaze the clothes because those may have been the things that were making her look good to the point of the other man coaxing her to bed,\u201d he says.<\/p>\n

\u201cZofoyira basi, kupanda nzeru kumeneko <\/em>(its\u2019 just some crazy and dull reasoning). The wife can continue \u2018prostituting\u2019, the best he would have done was to eject her from the matrimonial home because he achieved nothing by beating her and setting her clothes ablaze; he did not solve the problem,\u201d says Grawel.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut don\u2019t you think it is better to maintain the devil you know than divorcing her and start scouting for a new one. Guys, let us learn to forgive, even the Bible advocates so!\u201d Exclaims \u2018Atsogoleri\u2019 Rob M.<\/p>\n

But our controversial \u2018foot soldier\u2019, Joe, bashes the reasoning.<\/p>\n

\u201cAtsogoleri\u2019, you and me know that the worst thing a man can tolerate from a wife, or even lover, is to have someone partaking in his bedroom specialty. Any man who can forgive the wife after being caught red handed doing that sort of thing deserves to be admitted at that other special hospital in Zomba.\u201d<\/p>\n

I come in: \u201cAnd what happens if, and when, men are caught by our wives and lovers in the act of adultery? Are we better placed to sin than women? Have you, people, read a book called Animal Farm<\/em>? This tendency of being harsh on women and thinking women should be soft on us actually promotes the concept of \u2018some animals are more equal than others\u2019 as advocated in the Animal Farm.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThen, we should all go for the concept of \u2018Cut the head, get rid of the body\u2019 when any one of the couple in marriage is caught in adulterous acts. Zizingothapo basi, bandi igawane zida <\/em>[the relationships should just end]!\u201d says Joe, ending the debate by throwing a round of beer.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There is some place in Blantyre, where pub talk is usually diverse. Within the complex, there are three bars: one for those who like loud music and the other two for gurus who like sipping their \u2018stuff\u2019 as they tackle all sorts of issues. It is in one of the latter where we are. We […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":21781,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-52748","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.times.mw\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/52748","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.times.mw\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.times.mw\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.times.mw\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.times.mw\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=52748"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/archive.times.mw\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/52748\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":52749,"href":"https:\/\/archive.times.mw\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/52748\/revisions\/52749"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.times.mw\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/21781"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.times.mw\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=52748"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.times.mw\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=52748"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.times.mw\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=52748"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}